Surprise, surprise! A bunch of greedy millionaires and billionaires couldn't come to an agreement about the amount of money they want and now the NFL has entered a lockout. Fantastic.
Wah wah wah I'm only getting ten million and I want twenty! This is so unfair!
Someone call the Waaaaaaaaah-bulance.
If you recall, NFL commishioner Roger Goodell made a promise that if there was a lockout, he'd reduce his 10 million salary to just one dollar. I guess he underestimated the pettiness that money instills in people because now he's forced to make good on his promise.
Mr. Good Guy Roger Goodell will reportedly keep his word and reduce his salary to a buck in an effort to make himself appear super awesome and be like the common man.
He's one of us now! A common man!
In order to adjust to his new life and see what it is like to be poor, he reportedly started watching Nascar.
His previous lifestyle was expensive though, and that one dollar salary just might not cut it. He may have to collect cans.
Or hit the streets hard and pan handle. You know, get a good honest day's work.
Maybe he'll even do what a bench of med students do and dance their way through the rough times to pay their bills!
You know what though? We're not fooled.
Is Roger really this good of a guy? Probably not. We don't know him personally but really, the guy isn't hurting for money. He's likely just trying to deflect some heat from himself by bringing himself down to the level of us "commoners."
You're not fooling anybody pal. You're probably sitting at home throwing money into the air and watching it rain.
All this lockout does is highlight how incredibly greedy everyone involved is. This probably all could've been prevented. But apparently a few extra bucks are more important than entertaining fans or making sure the players who actually sacrifice their bodies get an extra piece of the pie.
Remember when sports was simply about the entertainment? Yeah, neither do we.