Jay Cutler's lame and so is anybody who cares

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Jay Cutler's lame and so is anybody who cares

By Mary Paoletti
CSNNE.com

This just in: Jay Cutler is whack.

Just kidding!

This isn't a newsflash. People have disliked the Bears quarterback since before he was the Bears quarterback. I'm not going to say that the doctor who pulled baby Cutler out of the womb wanted to slap him across the face instead of the butt when he saw this:

...but Rick Reilly is.

Yes, the ESPN carnival worker took time off from all that to write about how unlikable Cutler is.

I actually like this column.

The anecdotes are interesting; they paint a fresh landscape of Cutler-Sucks-Ville. By the end of the story my upper lip was curled into a snarl: "Only a total jerk would date a member from an MTV reality series" I growled. And that was even after I learned Kristin Cavallari was on "The OC" and not "16 and Pregnant."

Regardless. Reilly's bottom line was that Cutler's a meanie and Chicago fans should be worried because the QB's not switching gears anytime soon.

But why should he?

Why does a quarterback have to be a nice guy? Why does he have to give a full logistical report on his interceptions? I've watched Peyton Manning shut down on a question like that right in front of my face.

Why does Cutler have to bow down and lick-shine John Elway's shoes? True, the kid wasn't just refusing to fall over himself to be polite; he was downright rude. But should Bears fans be wringing their hands over that fact right now?

Their team is in the playoffs.

I want to meet the Bears fan who, if Chicago beats Seattle on Sunday, will sob uncontrollably because Cutler didn't smile and giggle after every throw (or sack).

I want to meet the Bears fan who won't even watch the game because Cutler doesn't look "really, truly" happy to be playing the game of football.

Do you think Chicago cares? I mean, really?

Reilly says yes. He uses this quote, from former Bear and sports radio host Tom Waddle, as 'evidence': "In Chicago, they want to love you. They want to make a connection with you. Any kind of connection. But Jay doesn't really care."

Let's just say Chicago wins the Super Bowl

I doubt anybody in the crowd would stand up and scream, "NO."

"NO, NO NO. GET THAT LOMBARDI TROPHY OUT OF MY FACE. JAY CUTLER AND THE CITY OF CHICAGO DO NOT DESERVE THIS BECAUSE HE IS NOT A NICE MAN."

There is no way in hell that's going to happen. And none of the fans would holler such a ridiculous statement afterward, either.

Trust me, I'm not volunteering to interview the guy. I'm also not advocating that people have personal expectations for athletes. It's wonderful when they save three-legged puppies for funsies, give homeless people piggy-back rides to shelters, or look like Wally Sczerbiack (it's a goodwill effort, believe that).

But the thing of the thing? They don't have to. They have to be good at sports.

That might be actually be a Cutler debate worth having in Chi-Town.

Ramirez, Leon homer, Red Sox beat Angels 9-4 on Papi's night

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Ramirez, Leon homer, Red Sox beat Angels 9-4 on Papi's night

BOSTON - Hanley Ramirez and Sandy Leon hit two-run homers and the Boston Red Sox beat the Los Angeles Angels 9-4 on Friday to cap a night in which David Ortiz's number became the latest retired at Fenway Park.

It was the 250th career home run for Ramirez, a good friend of Ortiz who was also born in the Dominican Republic. Leon finished with three hits and four RBIs.

The homers helped provide a nice cushion for Rick Porcello (4-9), who gave up four runs and struck out eight in 6 1/3 innings to earn the victory. It was the 13th straight start Porcello has gone at least six innings.

Alex Meyer (3-4) allowed five runs and five hits in 3 1/3 innings.

Los Angeles scored three runs in the seventh, but cooled off after Porcello left.

Boston got out to a 3-0 lead in the first inning, scoring on an RBI double by Xander Bogaerts and then getting two more runs off wild pitches by Meyer.

Ramirez gave Porcello a 5-1 lead in the fourth with his two-run shot to right field.

This could serve as a needed confidence boost for Porcello, who had been 0-4 with a 7.92 ERA in his previous five starts, allowing 47 hits and 27 earned runs.

He had command of his pitches early, holding the Angels scoreless until the fourth, when a catching error by Leon at home allowed Albert Pujols to cross the plate.

Drew Moor, Sebastian Giovinco score, Toronto FC beats Revolution, 2-0

Drew Moor, Sebastian Giovinco score, Toronto FC beats Revolution, 2-0

TORONTO - Drew Moor scored early and Sebastian Giovinco struck late and Toronto FC overcame a tight schedule turnaround to beat the New England Revolution 2-0 on Friday night.

Toronto was coming off a 1-1 tie Wednesday night in Montreal in the first leg of the Canadian Championship final. The Revs had been off since a 2-1 home loss to Chicago on Saturday.

Moor's 11th-minute goal looked to be enough, with Toronto goalkeeper Alex Bono preserving the win with a save on Teal Bunbury's header in the 88th minute. But Giovinco added an insurance goal deep into stoppage time, bringing down a high ball before beating a defender and banging a left-footed shot home for his 50th goal in MLS regular-season and playoff action.

MLS leading Toronto (10-2-5) has won seven straight at home. New England (5-7-5) is 0-6-3 on the road.