How to win Twitter friends and influence Habs fan anger

607304.jpg

How to win Twitter friends and influence Habs fan anger

By Jon Fucile
WickedGoodSports.com

Twitter is a good way to bring fans together in one place to talk about the team they love and have good-natured battles with fans from opposing teams. You can send Tweets you like to all your followers, make your own and have private conversations with Montreal Canadiens fans as soon as theyre done setting their house on fire after a first period goal.

But if you really want to get into some good debates you need to make more friends! Today, we here at Wicked Good Sports are going to walk you through a few examples and better prepare you for the world of Twitter sports arguments.

Were sure youre sitting there saying I dont need tips Ill just be nice to everyone! You could not possibly be more wrong.

Take for example the start of the Bruins-Canadiens game Monday night. Our subject went right on the offensive as soon as the puck dropped:

Classic move! In this example, Montreal fans like to pretend their players are respectable and get SUPER upset if you make jokes about diving or faking injuries.

It also helps if you make reference to some recent history between the team. After the incident between Max Pacioretty and Zdeno Chara, Dr. Mark Recchi made a joke about how Pacioretty might have been exaggerating his injuries if he was at the movies a couple days later.

Because this is still a sensitive topic, our subject here is sure to get a lot of replies after that comment, increasing his Twitter awareness.

Next, start attacking players who are slumping, talentless or way over paid. If you can find a player on the opposing team that is all three you should certainly target them.

As that fool Bill Simmons has taught us, making silly pop culture references also seems to help with the insult. Science currently has no explanation for this.

Next, mock the tradition of the team and city and talk about the history that 90 of their current fan base wasnt alive for but still quotes every five seconds.

By this point your inbox should be FULL with comments about your mother, bad things happening to your behind and death threats. Sip some hot cocoa and laugh as the hate mail rolls on it.

Almost every dumb fan base like the one in this example only talks trash when their team is winning. Make sure to call them on that and invite more dialogue.

The goal here is to spark more conversation and this should do the trick.

Another important move is to call the opposing fan base on their hypocrisy as often as possible. In our case study today, Montreal fans love to talk about how the Bruins players are dirty. When a player from their team does something dirty, and believe us it WILL happen, make sure to mention it. The opposing fan base will LOVE it.

The opposing fans will make a series of illogical excuses so just laugh in their faces and carry on.

By now, your Twitter feed should be blowing up and you should be enjoying all the hate. At this point you need to forget any morals you may have and go for the throat. Mention something terrible that happened to the opposing team again and make casual jokes about it as if you dont care.

If Gwen Stefani were here, she would say that at this point the opposing fans will be going b-a-n-a-n-a-s! bananas!

When they start tossing bigoted statements your way, again mention how much their team disgraces the game and how much they suck. This will just twist the knife a little deeper and work them into a bigger frenzy.

Once you can literally feel their fury through the computer screen it is time to sign off and let them stew. Oddly enough, this will anger them more than if you stayed and harassed them more. Sign off with a parody of a song you like that talks about the opposing team.

Youll be super popular in no time!

Also, Montreal is the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked.

Bart Scott: Falcons have 'the better quarterback' in Super Bowl

Bart Scott: Falcons have 'the better quarterback' in Super Bowl

Former Ravens and Jets linebacker - now an "NFL Today" analyst for CBS - Bart Scott usually "can't wait" to make his disdain for Tom Brady and the Patriots known. 

He was back at it Tuesday in an interview with CBS Radio's Damon Amendolara, in which he said the Falcons have the better quarterback heading into Super Bowl LI.

“We know they’re the better offense, and right now, you could say they got the better quarterback because they have the MVP of the league,” Scott said. Ryan is the favorite to win the NFL MVP, which will be announced the night before the Super Bowl at the "NFL Honors" show.

“Now that’s a debate, but Matt Ryan has earned the right for his name to be put up there with the upper-echelon quarterbacks," Scott said. "He’s always been elite in the regular season, but now he’s taken this show into the postseason and he’s won the hard battles against the elite quarterbacks and now you have to give him his due.”

More from Scott: “I can’t see the Patriots stopping this offense. So, that means that these receivers are going to have to [keep] pace. It’s all going to come down to what it always comes down to. It’s going to come down to who makes the turnovers, who gets up early and puts the pressure on the other team. Matt Ryan and that offense showed me a lot when they went behind [in the divisional round against the Seahawks]. Seattle came and busted them in the face, and [Atlanta] went right back down and answered immediately.

"The Patriots always find a way, but I think it makes it more close of a game than what people think.”

Tuesday, Jan. 24: Crosby, Matthews top coaches' poll

Tuesday, Jan. 24: Crosby, Matthews top coaches' poll

Here are all the links from around the hockey world, and what I’m reading, while rooting for “Manchester By the Sea” to upset some favorites at the Oscars.

*Sidney Crosby and Auston Matthews top the annual NHL coaches' poll produced by TSN Insider Bob McKenzie.

*The oral history of Fox’s glowing puck used for the NHL during their run with the league is an entertaining one.

*Mike Babcock gives pep talks to the reporters along with his own players while running the show in Toronto.

*The Vegas Golden Knights are moving forward with their timetable toward hiring a coach with some good candidates out there now, and some other ones potentially available soon. I’ve wondered if Claude Julien would be interested in that spot if he’s let go by the Bruins this season, but the one sure thing is that he wouldn’t be out of work long if he is relieved of his duties.

*Claude Giroux needs to start playing a little more fearlessly and without dwelling on mistakes, according to his general manager.

*Detroit Red Wings coach Jeff Blashill doesn’t believe that fancy stats and analytics have had a major impact on the way the Wings do things.

*PHT writer James O’Brien has the rundown on a Millenial’s dream of performers at the 2017 NHL All-Star Game: Nick Jonas, Fifth Harmony and Carly Rae Jepsen.

*For something completely different: keeping an eye on the notion that Facebook’s Mark Zuckerberg is going to run for President.