Chara the Montreal Menace


Chara the Montreal Menace

By Jon Fucile

Fans of the Montreal Canadiens are gifts to people like us who like to mock stupid, stupid people.

Apparently Zdeno Chara is not just a man who laid down an unfortunate hit on Max Pacioretty. He is a menace to society and he must be stopped!

Some Canadian website put together a video of Chara's hits, which were basically a compilation of clean but hard hockey hits and fights, two things that are abundant, common and perfectly legal in the sport of hockey.

The same site went on to say how Chara is a menace to society, but really this is just another case of Montreal seeing something that happened and twisting it to fit their point of few. Here are a few other examples of other stupid stories theyve printed about Chara.

This "menace" happened to be walking down the street the other day and saw a bus about to fall of a bridge. The bus had been cut off by another car and turned to the side to avoid it and found itself hanging precariously over a ledge! That is when Chara sprung into action to save the day.

But when the story was published in Montreal, it looked something like this:

Chara is always willing to lend a hand to help. On his way to Bible study, he stumbled upon an elderly lady who needed help crossing the street. Chara was happy to oblige!

Some Montreal reporter heard about the story and put his own spin on the events:

These damn canucks have no shame!

Later that same day Chara found a little girl by the side of the road crying. Her poor little kitty cat was stuck up in a tree! Chara simply told her to wait a second and he went to work.

What a guy!

That won't be the story you hear in Montreal, though. They twisted it to make it appear as though Chara loves a good kitten sandwich.


A word of warning though Montreal. You're pissing off Charlie Sheen and Mel Gibson. When compared to you Montreal, those two look like the most normal, down to earth guys on the planet. Theyre coming for you.

But thanks for making sure your city, and vicariously your country, will continue to be a punch line around the rest of the world for years to come.

And also thanks for giving us an idea for a new kids show!

Bruins' 2017-18 schedule has three Habs games in eight days

Bruins' 2017-18 schedule has three Habs games in eight days

The Bruins released their schedule for the 2017-18 season Thursday, with their campaign beginning at TD Garden on Oct. 5 against the Predators. 

Two things stand out in Boston’s schedule. Eleven of their final 15 games are on the road, and they don’t play the Canadiens until mid-January.  

Then, when the B’s and Habs do finally meet, they play three times in an eight-day span. The rivals face each other Jan. 13 in Montreal, Jan. 17 in Boston and Jan. 20 in Montreal. The Bruins’ final regular-season meeting with the Habs is March 3. 

To see the full schedule, click here. 

Morning Skate: How Haggs voted for the NHL Awards

Morning Skate: How Haggs voted for the NHL Awards

Here are all the links from around the hockey world and my ballot from last night’s NHL Awards now that the results are in. I can confirm I was not the one person to give Torey Krug a Norris Trophy vote despite what the unwashed masses in Ottawa choose to believe. Also, I did not throw a first-place vote to Brad Marchand in Hart Trophy voting. Still, I think it’s a safe bet that the same person did both.

Anyway, on to my ballot with a brief explanation for each of the votes:

Hart Trophy

1. Connor McDavid

2. Sidney Crosby

3. Brent Burns

4. Patrick Kane

5. Brad Marchand

McDavid was the obvious MVP as he helped lift the Oilers into the playoffs, and was the only guy in the NHL to hit 100 points this past season. In hindsight, I should have included Sergei Bobrovsky and omitted Patrick Kane from the list and always have a difficult time determining when a season from a goalie is or isn’t Hart-worthy. But I certainly feel good about throwing a fifth-place vote to Marchand after a phenomenal season for the B’s.

Norris Trophy:

1. Brent Burns

2. Erik Karlsson

3. Victor Hedman

4. Duncan Keith

5. Zach Werenski

Burns had such a transcendent offensive season for the Sharks and I like the fact that he can play a physical game as well as roaming around creating offense. That being said, it would have been an easy first place vote for Karlsson if the playoffs were included along with the regular season. The fifth place vote was the only one I really had to think hard and long about but felt like Werenski really played a big role in the Columbus turnaround this season.

Calder Trophy

1. Auston Matthews

2. Zach Werenski

3. Patrik Laine

4. William Nylander

5. Matt Murray

Plenty of good rookies to choose from in the voting, but it was fairly easy to choose Matthews as a dominant force for a Leafs team on the upswing. 40 goals as a 19-year-old rookie is a ridiculous amount of goals.

Lady Byng

1.  Oscar Klefbom

2.  Johnny Gaudreau

3.  Brandon Saad

4.  Marian Hossa

5.  Marcus Johansson

My votes are usually all over the map for Lady Byng, but Klefbom and Gaudreau were both solid picks as the top two. Gaudreau finished with 60 plus points and just four penalty minutes, and that’s pretty tough to do.

Selke Trophy

1. Bergeron

2. Kesler

3. Koivu

4. O’Reilly

5. Toews

All Bergeron all the way and there was a wide margin between him and second place. The fact he managed to play at a Selke level while also being hurt the entire season just adds to the toughness factor for the best two-way player I’ve covered in my time in Boston.   

On to the links...

*FOH (Friend of Haggs) Chris Johnston has the Golden Knights ready to take their first step toward contending after building their team, and their coffers, at the expansion draft.

*We’ll see how history views this trade a year or two down the line, but the Islanders definitely got a lot better with Jordan Eberle joining John Tavares in Brooklyn next season.

*Fresh off his Norris Trophy win, bearded Brent Burns was mistaken for a swashbuckling pirate on a visit to Disney.

*Reilly Smith is on the move again, this time to the Vegas Golden Knights, and the word on the street was that Boston inquired about bringing him back if the Panthers were willing to take Jimmy Hayes back. Don’t think it was much of a conversation. I guess there really is no trade-backesies in the NHL.

*PHT writer Cam Tucker has the Nashville Predators pretty busted up after losing James Neal in the expansion draft.

*For something completely different: Ron Howard is taking over directing the standalone Han Solo movie, and I’ve got to say that I don’t hate this.