A Texans Guarantee?

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A Texans Guarantee?

Over the last few days, theres been a ton of conversation both locally and nationally surrounding a recent column by the Boston Globes Dan Shaughnessy.

In case you missed it, Shaughnessy used his space in Sundays paper to make an over-the-top guarantee about this week's PatriotsTexans game. "Pass Go and collect 200," he wrote. "The Patriots are in the AFC title game."

What happened next?

Well, for a multitude of reasons (most of which pretty much disprove the existence of God), the column went viral, somehow ended up in Arian Fosters Twitter avatar and has since become a 'round-the-clock talking point for media folks nationwide.

Of course, from a Patriots perspective, the biggest concern stemming from Shaughnessy's think piece is that it provides unnecessary inspiration and bulletin board material for a team that already has enough.

But thankfully, it seems one Houston-area writer has set out to even the score. His name is Shaughn Daniels (@shaughndaniels) and he's a columnist from the Galveston Globe. I'm not going to link to his story because Daniels clearly only wrote it to stir the pot, troll the masses and get a few cheap clicks. I don't want to support that.

But at the very least, maybe spreading his nonsense can provide a little extra motivation for the Pats, and offset whatever damage was done by the Dean Wormer of the Boston sports media scene.

Read on at your own risk . . .

Destiny Awaits Texans
By: Shaughn Daniels
Galveston Globe columnist (@ShaughnDaniels)

Houston we have a problem . . .

A NEEDING-TO-BUY-SUPER-BOWL-TICKETS PROBLEM!The 2012-13 Houston Texans have been waiting all season for this moment, and their master plan has finally fallen into place. Mark it down, gang: February 3, 2013 your Houston Texans are headed to New Orleans.Catch my drift?I mean, seriously? In the business, we call this a lock. We call this destiny. Only road games against the Patriots and Broncos stand between Houston and their first-ever Super Bowl appearance? Thats right, Texans fans. Do the hokey pokey and turn yourself around, because thats what its all about. The Promised Land.Isnt it?My point is that theres no chance in hell that the Texans lose to the new-age choke artists on Sunday. The Patriots? Ha! What is this 2005?! NOT. The days of New England coming up big when it matters most are over. Anyone can see that. Do you know what I mean?

The regular season is well and good, my friends. But lately, when the Patriots get to the playoffs, they end up going directly to jail. They don't pass GO. It's not a race. It's not a chase. They don't hurry up and feed their face. They lose. They lost to the Giants, they lost to the Jets, they lost to the Ravens, they lost to the Giants. They've lost four playoffs games in the last five years, and guess what, folks?

They were favored every time.

They choked.

That means that they will choke again. You dig? You don't need a PHD from Rice to know how predictable sports are. And this one is about as predictable as they come.

The Pats don't have a chance.

You feel me?

It's THAT easy.

NFL playoffs?

The Texans are going to win!

First of all, because Bill Belichick is one of the most fraudulent coaches in NFL history. Let's see how he would have done with David Carr under center, right? I mean, did you see what happened the one year he didn't have Brady? HE DIDN'T EVEN MAKE THE PLAYOFFS. Fraud.

Oh yeah and can this guy even coach defense anymore? Have you seen the Patriots 'D' this year? I know I haven't (Confession: I fell asleep in the first quarter of that Monday nighter). Still, New England's defense is weaker than a one-sentence paragraph. More useless than a rhetorical question. Seriously, can you imagine anything worse than the Patriots secondary?

Maybe Stevan Ridley. Or as I call him "Mr. Dropsies."

Ridley fumbles every single game. He'll obviously fumble on Sunday. And when he does, I guarantee the Texans recover. This time, I guarantee it's going to be different.

There's no way that the Patriots can contain Arian Foster and JJ Watt again. It's literally impossible. The Pats won't know what hit them. They know they got lucky last time. We all know they did.

This is the match-up the Texans have been waiting for. This is how it was always supposed to go: Lose to the Pats. Then keep losing. Just enough to guarantee a rematch and lure them into a false sense of security. It's the same move the Jets pulled two years ago and you saw how well that worked. THIS IS THE EXACT SAME THING.

The Texans have spent the last month playing dead in the weeds, while the fraudulent Patriots who haven't won a Super Bowl in eight years, and have a quarterback who's getting older and slower and less effective every week have predictability spent the time building up false expectations. Am I the only one who sees this?!

Of course not.

It's not even up for debate.

And neither is that fact that after dispatching of the pathetic chokers in New England, the Texans will cruuuuise past the Broncos. Why?

Um, have you forgotten Week 3?

Texans 31, Broncos 25, IN DENVER.

There's now way that kind of regular season dominance doesn't transfer into the playoffs. It always does! The Texans will show up at Mile High and pick up right we're they left off.

But first, they have to make a quick stop in Foxboro.

I'll see you in New Orleans.

Shaughn can be reached at shaughndaniels@gmail.com. Follow Shaughn on Twitter at http:twitter.comshaughndaniels

(And Rich can be reached at rlevine@comcastsportsnet.com. Follow Rich on Twitter at http:twitter.comrich_levine)

Curran: To gauge Patriots' plans for Jimmy G, look to Brissett

Curran: To gauge Patriots' plans for Jimmy G, look to Brissett

When trying to figure out what the Patriots will ultimately do with Jimmy Garoppolo, forget about the speculation and instead focus on the little things the team does. 

Like how they are tending to Jacoby Brissett. 

After having thumb surgery on Oct. 7, Brissett was put on IR. But the team used its one "Get off of IR free card" on Brissett and he's been practicing with the team for the past couple of weeks while not taking up a roster spot. 

That alone isn't compelling evidence that he's the backup-in-waiting and Garoppolo's about to be packed up and shipped out, argued my compadre, Senator Phil Perry. The team had no other players on IR that they could use the designation on at the time. Why not use it on Brissett?

Prior to that, though, we've seen Brissett accompanying the team to away games including the cross-country junket to San Francisco. A reason? Since the Patriots played three straight at Gillette at the start of the season when Brissett was the direct backup to Garoppolo, he didn't get a good look at the road operation and the tempo of being the visiting team. How things work on flights, in meetings, at opposing stadiums and on the sidelines is worth getting a promising young players' eyes on. Also, getting his offensive teammates used to having him around is probably an even bigger benefit. It's not unprecedented to have IR players travel but its not conventional practice either. 

With so many quarterback-needy teams around the league, Garoppolo is perhaps the most attractive option out there. By the end of this year, he will have apprenticed three seasons behind the best quarterback of all-time in a sophisticated offense for a program that's as demanding as any in the league. In the 10 quarters he was able to play as a starter in place of Tom Brady, he was sensational.

He got hurt and that's not great. But any team making a deal for him that has concerns about his durability can take him for a spin for one season. Garoppolo is on the books for $825K in 2017 and then his contract is up. The team that dealt for him can franchise him if they need another season to think on it. 

I don't think the Patriots are itching to move Garoppolo. They know they are sitting comfortably with a stack of the most valuable commodity in the sport -- good quarterbacks (or at least one great one and two promising ones) - piled in front of them. They can let the game come to them. 

If it does, as former Patriots executive and Bill Belichick consigliere Mike Lombardi thinks it will, the Patriots can rest easy dealing Garoppolo knowing that they already did advance work getting Brissett up to speed. 

Brady, Harbaugh found common ground on plane ride back from Michigan

Brady, Harbaugh found common ground on plane ride back from Michigan

FOXBORO -- What could have been an awkward plane ride for Tom Brady and John Harbaugh was made less so thanks to a high school lacrosse player. 

Brady and Harbaugh shared a private plane back from Michigan where Jim Harbaugh and his University of Michigan program put on an event for National Signing Day. About a year earlier, Brady told a room full of reporters that Harbaugh and his coaching staff should study the rule book and "figure it out" after hearing that they were pretty upset about the unusual formations the Patriots ran during their AFC Divisional Round win over Baltimore. 

They may not have been on the best of terms.

"I was pissed off," he told ESPN's Ian O'Connor before the start of this season. "It was uncalled for. And the rules are deeper than that, and I know the rules, and I stand by why that play shouldn't have been allowed. ... So yeah, that should never have been said."

But on the flight was Harbaugh's daughter Alison, a high school lacrosse player. When Brady took some time to share a few thoughts on competitiveness with her, he and Harbaugh found common ground.

"We had a lot of fun," Harbaugh said of the flight. "I don't know if he's talked about that at all, but we ended up sharing a plane ride along with my daughter and a couple of his people, friends of his. We just had a chance to just talk for a couple hours. And really more than anything, Alison got a chance to listen to Tom Brady talk about competing and what it takes to be great at what you do.

"And one of the funny things about it was, he was so nice to her. He gets off and they go, and we get back on the plane and we're talking, and she says something like, 'Boy, Tom really is a nice guy.' And I look at here and go, 'Tom?' I'm thinking 'Mr. Brady' would have been more appropriate. She said, 'He said to call me Tom.' I got a kick out of that.

"It was good. Lot of respect for him and a lot of respect for what he's accomplished. He's very tough to compete against. The best quarterback that's played, certainly in this era, without question in my mind. That's how I would rank him. And it's just another tough challenge to have to play against him."