Ocho gets his Johnson back

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Ocho gets his Johnson back

Chad Ochocinco, who changed his name from Chad Johnson in August of 2008 so that his surname reflected the Spanish pronounciation of his uniform number, has changed his name back to Chad Johnson.

(Pause here to reflect on the enormous absurdity of the above sentence and also to realize that we've come to accept news like this as completely normal in the case of this person.)

Ochocinco, who was released by the Patriots this offseason then signed by the attention-starved Miami Dolphins, was at Broward County Courthouse on Monday morning to return his name to Johnson.

Wouldn't you love to see this guy's "to-do" list?

1. Twitter stuff
2. Stop by Starbucks
3. Stop by IHOP
4. See if HBO needs me to do anything for Hard Knocks
5. Get to courthouse to change name back to Johnson
6. Twitter stuff (explain how name change reflects me being serious about stuff)
7. Don't study new offensive playbook
8. Tell someone new offense "nearly mastered, grasshopper..."
9. Call HBO guy to see if they need Evelyn for HK
10. Drive Prius around and wave
11. Be myself
12. Be myself pretending to be someone else being myself
13. Twitter stuff
14. Work out (tweet pics)
15. Editorial mtg, OCNN
16. Twitter stuff

Joking aside, it's worth noting that for all the fun had at Ocho's expense, the guy's heart is good, he makes people smile, and nowhere on the list will you find "Get drunk, punch cop, drive blind or pass out on sidewalk."

Tom Brady, Vanilla Ice look like BFFs at Under Armour event

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Tom Brady, Vanilla Ice look like BFFs at Under Armour event

Watch out Julian Edelman, Wes Welker and Alex Guerrero. Tom Brady just might have a new best friend. 

At an Under Armour event that took place on Wednesday, rapper Vanilla Ice snapped a selfie with the Patriots quarterback, who was grinning from ear to ear. 

In South Baltimore, "Armour Day" was held in order to celebrate Under Armour's 20th year in business. Brady was one of many athletes in attendance, including Jordan Spieth, Lindsey Vonn, Deion Sanders, Ray Lewis, Cal Ripken, Boomer Esiason and Roger Clemens. 

Brady is one of the faces of Under Armour, along with Spieth and Warriors guard Steph Curry. When he signed in 2010, he received equity in the company as part of the deal. 

Palazzolo: Mitchell ‘flashes really good downfield ball skills’

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Palazzolo: Mitchell ‘flashes really good downfield ball skills’

Fourth-round pick Malcolm Mitchell is the next in a line of receivers the Patriots have drafted in hopes they’d click with quarterback Tom Brady.

As part of the Quick Slants the podcast draft recap episode, Steve Palazzolo of Pro Football Focus told Phil Perry that Mitchell looks to be a fit in the role previously filled by Brandon LaFell and Brandon Lloyd. Palazzolo said Mitchell could serve as a complement to Rob Gronkowski, Julian Edelman, and Martellus Bennett.

“I think that’s where Mitchell fits in. And I think he does a pretty good job there creating separation on the routes the Patriots need him to run,” Palazzolo said. “He flashes some really good downfield ball skills.”

To hear Palazzolo’s analysis on the rest of the Patriots draft picks, use the Sound Cloud player below or search CSNNE on iTunes.

https://soundcloud.com/csnne/quick-slants-the-podcast-ep-51-2016-patriots-draft-recap