The Plaxico Burress Sweepstakes!

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The Plaxico Burress Sweepstakes!

By Jon Fucile
WickedGoodSports.com

Do you guys and gals remember Plaxico Burress?

He was that marginally talented receiver with a head fun of bricks who shot himself in the leg at a night club and then went to jail because carrying weapons and firing them in a night club, even if it is an accident, is often frowned upon.

On a side note, someone should also look into bringing charges against his parents for naming him Plaxico. Seriously parents, think before you name your kids. Just because a name is different doesn't mean it is good or cool. This is borderline child abuse.

Anyway...where were we? Oh right, Mr. Burress.

He is getting out of jail next week and there is talk about him continuing his NFL career this season, assuming players and owners get over their petty arguments and there is a season, and apparently a few teams are interested.

Michael Vick spent a good amount of time in jail and is now thriving in the NFL and teams with a need for a receiver who isn't afraid to pack some heat are sniffing around Plaxico. If the NFL has a season, where would he fit in?

Here's a few teams that are interested and reasons why Plaxico could thrive there.

Baltimore Ravens

Burress has spent time in jail....and many believe Ray Lewis should have, so they have that in common. If you remember, years ago Lewis was accused of murder but got off by making a plea and testifying against his buddies.

It could potentially be a match made in heaven, especially when it comes to team costume parties.

Plaxico shot himself in the leg and rumor has it they used crude methods to replace his leg in prison. Supposedly he's got a peg leg like a pirate. Ray Lewis, much like a parrot, never ever shuts up when you want him to. They'll be fast friends.

Philadelphia Eagles

Michael Vick would welcome Plaxico with open arms. Perhaps having another guy on the team who made a terrible, idiotic mistake will take away any of the lingering talk of Vick's dog fighting ring. The two could give talks to their teammates about how bad jail is, detail all the lessons they learned and talk about how much they missed their mansions while in jail.

This would also be a huge boost for Eagles head coach Andy Reid. He could finally live out his dream of re-enacting that movie The Longest Yard with his ever growing collection of ex-convicts.

Vick has a much better arm than Adam Sandler. Not entirely sure Andy Reid is a better coach than Burt Reynolds though.

New York Jets

The Jets, as an organization, seem to love grabbing headlines more than grabbing titles and signing Plaxico would be about head line grabbing score for them and they'd have another receiver Mark Sanchez could under throw a ball to in a critical moment of a game.

Plaxico used to play for the Giants and is already accustomed to the New York night life, as the hole in his leg can attest to, and he can always bring his gun when the Jets play the Patriots and challenge those guys dressed like Minutemen on the sideline to a shooting contest!

Plus, Rex Ryan looks incredibly similar to the Big Boss Man, a wrestler who dressed like a prison guard, so maybe he could keep Plaxico in line.

Oakland Raiders

Just look at facts. Al Davis will sign ANYONE. You have to believe the Raiders will be in the mix.

Seriously, why is Al Davis still allowed to make decisions. And how is he still alive?!?!

New England Patriots

We know what you're thinking.... it is crazy to think the Pats would be interested. But Bill Belichick is a vengeful, vengeful man. He will probably sign Burress and then just bench him every game while Brady and Welker throw footballs at his head.

Yeah.this could be BIG trouble for Burress. Belichick is an angry man.

Ex-Patriot Ridley signs with Colts

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Ex-Patriot Ridley signs with Colts

After being cut from the Detriot Lions last week, Stevan Ridely has signed with the Indianapolis Colts.

The running back played for the Patriots for four seasons (2011-2014), averaging 4.3 yards per carry while scoring 22 touchdowns in 52 games. He only played in six game in his final year with New England as a result of a torn ACL and MCL.

Ridley played for the AFC-East rival New York Jets in 2015 with a limited role in the nine games he played.

 

Report: Pedroia to be away from the team temporarily

Report: Pedroia to be away from the team temporarily

Dustin Pedroia will miss Sunday night's game against Kansas City to attend to a family matter, according to Evan Drellich of the Boston Herald.

Drellich also reports that Pedroia may miss Monday's game against Tampa Bay, too.

This of course comes after Pedroia went 11-for-11 over a three-game stretch, and saw the streak end in the eighth inning of Saturday's 8-3 win over the Royals.

Pedroia is batting .398 (37-for-93) through 24 games in August, with a .430 on-base percentage. Boston's second baseman is one of -- if not the -- team's hottest hitter this month, hitting .458 (33-for-72) since moving to the leadoff role.

Morning Skate: Rangers seem to be a strong candidate for Shattenkirk

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Morning Skate: Rangers seem to be a strong candidate for Shattenkirk

Here are all the links from around the hockey world, and what I’m reading with Bruins captain’s practice set to kick off this coming week.

*The Rangers sound like they’ll be a strong candidate for Kevin Shattenkirk, and the Dallas Stars seem willing to stand pat at the goalie position.

*PHT writer James O’Brien speculates on who might be the next Artemi Panarin to break into the NHL ranks from overseas, and make a big impact.

*Yahoo fantasy hockey is making some changes this season, and those that liked to draft Dustin Byfuglien and Brent Burns are going to bummed about it.

*An original St. Louis Blues jersey from the old time hockey days has found its way back to its original home in St. Louis.

*Steve Simmons says that Dave Bolland has earned the right to be more than a punch line at this point in his career.

*Looking back on Phil Esposito’s classic speech amid the 1972 Summit Series.

*The All-Snub team for the World Cup of Hockey would be a talented lineup, and would no doubt be captained by P.K. Subban.

*For something completely different: those looking for signs of a rift between Bill Belichick and Tom Brady need to call off the search.