No cheering at Super Bowl XLV


No cheering at Super Bowl XLV

By Justin Aucoin

So, were not sure what the odds are (somewhere between unlikely and an absolute travesty), but there wont be cheerleaders at Super Bowl XLV.

We know that the NFL is supposed to stand for the No Fun League but this is cruel and unusual. Hell, its practically un-American.

Alas, we cant blame league officials for this one. Apparently the Packers and the Steelers dont have cheerleaders.

There are only six teams without cheer squads and two of them just happened to land in this years Super Bowl (OK, only partially true despite what some might say Green Bay actually borrows college cheerleaders).

We can understand why Green Bay doesnt have official cheerleaders. Its usually -100 to -200 F during most of the season. The poor cheer-gals would either be so covered up thered be no point, or they'd be turned black from frostbite in a matter of seconds.

And yet...

Still, theres a better chance of the Packers having a squad of this guy shaking pom-poms.

And by pom-poms we mean his moobs.

As for the Steelers, well insert generic Ben Roethlisberger joke.

Too soon?

Side note: You find a lot of interesting photos just by Google-image searching for Steelers fans. Some not exactly safe for work, FYI.

Were also amused that sports sites arent allowed to write an article about this story without showing you a photo of the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders.

Could be because the Super Bowl is in Dallas this year. Could be the outfits. Were not saying either way.

What we do know is that most of us probably never actually read the article. In fact, we have no evidence that shows that there is a body of text to go along with these headlines and photos. We will say that.

This all begs the question: Who the hell is FOX going to point their cameras at to keep our attention while rattling off hundreds of sponsors we dont care about?

And it brings up other important issues: Whos going to teach us to spell Packers and Steelers? Whos going to tell us when to chant D-fense!? Whos going to get us in trouble with our significant others while we drool over ourselves like toddlers?

Who knows?

The Super Bowl is a time when heroes are born. A time for people to step it up, take charge and show leadership.

We expect nothing less to come out of the Great Cheerleader Shortage of 2011.

Make sure to check out more fun with Photoshop from Justin and his team

Three things we learned from the Red Sox’ 11-9 loss to the Twins


Three things we learned from the Red Sox’ 11-9 loss to the Twins

Three things we learned from the Boston Red Sox’ 11-9 loss to the Minnesota Twins . . .

1) David Price isn’t having fun

Boston’s $217 million-dollar arm had another rough outing -- this time against a team that already has 60 losses.

Those are the team’s he’s supposed to dominate.

“It’s been terrible,” Price said on how his season has gone following the loss. “Just awful.”

Price’s mistakes have often been credited to mechanical mishaps this year. Farrell mentioned that following his start in New York, Price spent time working on getting more of a downhill trajectory on his pitches.

But Price doesn’t think his issue is physical.

So it must be mental -- but he doesn’t feel that’s the case either.

“Honestly I don’t think it’s either one of those,” Price said when asked which he thought was a factor. “It’s me going out there and making pitches. “

But when it comes down to the barebones, pitching -- much like anything else -- is a physical and mental act.

So when he says it’s neither, that’s almost impossible. It could be both, but it has to be one.

His mind could be racing out on the mound from a manifestation of the issues he’s had throughout the season.

Or it could just be that his fastball isn’t changing planes consistently, like Farrell mentioned.

Both could be possible too, but it takes a certain type of physical approach and mental approach to pitch -- and Price needs to figure out which one is the issue, or how to address both. 

2) Sandy Leon might be coming back to Earth

Over his last five games, Boston’s new leading catcher is hitting .176 (3-for-17), dropping his average to .395.

A couple things have to be understood. His average is still impressive. In the five games prior to this dry spell, Leon went 7-for-19 (.368) But -- much like Jackie Bradley Jr. -- Leon hasn’t been known for his offensive output throughout his career. So dry spells are always tests of how he can respond to adversity and make necessary adjustments quickly.

Furthermore, if he’s not so much falling into a funk as opposed to becoming the real Sandy Leon -- what is Boston getting?

Is his run going to be remembered as an exciting run that lasted much longer than anyone expected? Or if he going to show he’s a legitimate hitter that can hit at least -.260 to .280 with a little pop from the bottom of the line-up?

What’s more, if he turns back into the Sandy Leon he’s been throughout his career, the Red Sox will have an interesting dilemma on how to handle the catching situation once again.

3) Heath Hembree has lost the momentum he gained after being called up.

Following Saturday’s contest, the right-hander was demoted to Triple-A Pawtucket after an outing where he went 1/3 of an inning, giving up a run on three hits -- and allowing some inherited runners to score.

Hembree at one point was the savior of the bullpen, stretching his arm out over three innings at a time to bail out the scuffling Red Sox starting rotation that abused it’s bullpen.

His ERA is still only 2.41 -- and this has been the most he’s ever pitched that big league level -- but the Red Sox have seen a change in him since the All-Star break.

Which makes sense, given that hitters have seven hits and two walks against him in his 1.1 innings of work -- spanning four games since the break.

“He’s not confident pitcher right now,” John Farrell said about Hembree before announcing his demotion. “As good as Heath has been for the vast majority of this year -- and really in the whole first half -- the four times out since the break have been the other side of that.”

Joe Kelly will be the pitcher to replace Hembree and Farrell hopes to be able to stretch him out over multiple innings at a time, as well.