NHL Guardians: Worst. Superheroes. Ever.

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NHL Guardians: Worst. Superheroes. Ever.

By Justin Aucoin
Special contributor to WickedGoodSports.com

If you havent heard by now, the NHL has teamed up with Stan Lee (yknow, the guy who created Spider-Man, X-Men, etc.) to create the Guardian Project 30 new super heroes, one for each NHL team.

At first we were excited about the project. Hockey and comics? Jackpot!

Bu, of course, it also had the chance of going the way of the Mighty Ducks cartoon.

Or how about Pro Stars. Remember this 90s classic?

But we clung onto optimism thanks in part to this promo video:

Alas, it looks as if Stan Lee and the NHL put more effort into that promo vid than they have with the actual designing of the 30 Guardians. So far five guardians have been released and they are well special.

THE PENGUIN
A 100 rip off of another Stan Lee character: Cyclops.

THE BLACKHAWK
He controls the win. Ask anyone in Chicago and theyll tell you he doesnt do it very well.

THE HURRICANE
The NHLs Mortal Combat reject.

THE SABRE
Wait, arent you part of the DC universe?

THE KING
Thors bastard son. But hey, at least it wasnt this king:

This is what nightmares are made of.

After seeing these train wrecks our morbid side couldnt help but wonder what the other Guardians might look like. So, we pulled an Ethan Hunt, found the knock list and got some sneak previews of some Guardian designs for a few other teams.

THE LEAFS
Fight crime only in the morning and sometimes at dinner time when justice gets a special craving.

THE DEVIL
Fights injustice (bwah?) with his rocK. Only known enemy: Tenacious D

THE OILER
Super villains cant rule the world if they cant accord to drive getaway cars, right?

THE SENATOR
Finally, the hunchback from 300 finds a purpose.

WALKER, TEXAS RANGER
New York and Dallas are fighting over who gets the rights to Chuck Norris.

Insert Chuck Norris joke

THE PREDATOR
Ummm. Err.

His enemy:

And lastly:

THE BRUIN
CARE BEAR STARE!!!!!

We can only hope our intel is wrong and the last 25 Guardians are better. Fingers crossed

Check out Justin's other phenomenal photoshopping on the blog: Days of Y'Orr.

Quotes, notes and stars: Ramirez knows error 'can't happen'

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Quotes, notes and stars: Ramirez knows error 'can't happen'

Quotes, notes and stars from the Red Sox' 2-1 loss to the Los Angeles Angels ofAnaheim

Quotes:

"I tried to get two (outs) before I got one. That can't happen." - Hanley Ramirez on his throwing error which cost the Red Sox the game.

"Executing pitches - that's the name of the game." - David Price on improvement he showed from his last start.

"Fourth time through the order, middle of the lineup. . . Price had done his job. In a one-run game, we felt it was best to start a clean inning with a reliever." - John Farrell after lifting David Price after eight innings and 108 pitches.

Notes:

* Reliever Brad Ziegler was charged with the loss for the second straight game.

* Each of the last seven Red Sox losses has been by one or two runs.

* Dustin Pedroia has reached base in 31 consecutive games.

* The Red Sox four-game losing streak is their longest of the season.

* The Sox are now 9-23 in their last 32 meetings with the Angels.

* David Price did not allow a run for the second time this season.

Stars:

1) David Price

After a stretch of shaky outings, Price did his job with eight scoreless innings, getting 14 outs on groundouts while walking just one.

2) Jered Weaver

At times, the radar gun made Weaver's pitches look like softball offerings. But mixing junk, he held the Sox to a single run over 5 1/3 innings

3) Mookie Betts

He had just one hit - single in the eighth - but his sacrifice fly in the third produced the only run of the night.

First impressions: Ziegler can't finish Price's strong start

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First impressions: Ziegler can't finish Price's strong start

First impressions from the Red Sox' 2-1 loss to the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim

1) David Price pitched in the truest sense

Price wasn't necessarily overpowering with only six strikeouts in eight innings, but he succeeded in keeping the ball down in the zone, resulting in a ton of groundouts.

In eight innings, the Angels produced just two flouts to the outfield, both of them routine.

Otherwise, Price deftly mixed his changeup, slider and two-seamer to produce ground balls. His location was more precise and he induced weak contact in at-bat after at-bat.

 

2) The danger of a closer like Brad Ziegler was on display

The throwing error by Hanley Ramirez resulted in two runs scoring but Ziegler allowed three base hits to set the stage.

Ziegler doesn't get a lot of swing-and-miss with his sinker; what he gets is a lot of balls put in play. When things are going well, that results in groundouts; when they're not, it means baserunners and strange things happening.

As inconsistent as Craig Kimbrel has been in some non-save situations, he at least has the ability to record strikeouts and keep balls out of play.  That's not the case with Zieger, as the Red Sox learned the hard way in Anaheim Thursday night.

3) The Red Sox wisely took advantage of Jered Weaver on the bases

Weaver's high leg kick and reliance on off-speed pitches make for a slow delivery time to the plate. Dustin Pedroia would have easily stole second in the first but made the mistake of going into his slide too far ahead of the bag, and though initially ruled safe, was deemed out after a replay challenge.

In the sixth, Xander Bogaerts, was more successful in his stolen base. Neither steal led to a run, but the Sox did put some additional pressure on Weaver