By Adam Hart
Act like you've been there before.
It's the call of celebration-hating fans and talking heads alike, seeking to quell creativity in the wake of a touchdown, home run or church service.
Doing the Dougie at the altar? How crude.
This type of naysaying is contagious, a readily-available salvo for the most unoriginal of critics. Jets cornerback Antonio Cromartie has caught the bug.
Aside from using nasty language to describe Tom Brady, Cromartie echoed Rex Ryan's charges that the Patriots quarterback pointed at the Jets' sideline after tossing a touchdown in a 45-3 trampling of Gang Green. It's impolite to point.
"Be professional," whined Cromartie on Wednesday. "He's been there before, he knows how to score touchdowns. Act like it and go back to the sideline."
Exactly. And Cromartie knows from experience. He is, after all, the father of nine children by eight women, sprinkled across six of our glorious states.
"After the third kid it's not really cause for celebration. Don't get me wrong; I still went about my business. Just didn't see the need to celebrate or even acknowledge them," Cromartie didn't actually say.
But you can imagine what it'd be like if he did, right? Eh, eh?