Hard work is for losers, just ask Miami

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Hard work is for losers, just ask Miami

By Jon Fucile
Special contributor to WickedGoodSports.com

The Miami Heat have been the NBA's, and arguably the sports world's, hottest topic since the season opened. You all know the story of how Dwyane Wade, Chris Bosh and the weak willed LeBron James got together to form the greatest dynasty in NBA history and win eleven consecutive NBA titles!!!

Oh wait, that's just what they predicted. Sorry.

Unfortunately for the self absorbed trio, life has not been all lollipops and rainbows.

You all know by now that the Heat stars are upset because their coach is making them work too hard. Poor 'lil guys. They wanted to just hang out all day and high five, not practice or work hard on the court. The NBA, and all the other teams, should just hand them titles because they're so super awesome. Hard work is overrated. Maybe the three of them could go to schools and teach that to kids.

But their reaction got us thinking' what if other 'great' people throughout history decided they didn't want to work hard for their goals either? We decided to take a look.

What if our fore fathers did not feel like working hard? What if they just said fighting the British is too much work, let us give up and just let the British continue to rule us? What if Ben Franklin, Thomas Jefferson and Paul Revere said screw, let's go drink some tea and buy some red coats and get on this British bandwagon?

Instead of playing basketball James, Bosh and Wade would be wearing knickers and eating tea and crumpets.

What if Dr. James Naismith did not want to work hard?

For those of you who do not know, Dr. Naismith was a Canadian P.E. professor at the YMCA. One rainy afternoon he was trying to figure out how to keep his class active indoors and began to formulate what would become current day basketball.

He decided on the rules and then put up a peach basket for the kids to shoot into and thus the game of basketball was born.

But what if Dr. Naismith did not want to work hard? What if he was content to let the kids run wild in the gym while he just took a nap?

Chris Bosh, Lebron James and Dwyane Wade would probably have other jobs. Low impact jobs that require little to no work. Like testing hammocks.

To further complicate the problem for the the Heat, unlike in modern times when the ball simply falls back down through the net after a basket, the peach basket still had the bottom attached and the ball had to be manually retrieved. If the Miami Heat played in those days, they would never score more than 2 or 3 points. Getting the ball would probably be too much work.

Instead of shooting into a peach basket, Dwyane and LeBron would hang out in the hammock and make Bosh pick them peaches.

Millions of peaches. Peaches for free.

Evolution works hard every day. Both humans and animals are leagues ahead of where they used to be all thanks to the hard work of evolution.

But what if one day, back when people were evolving, evolution just said... you know what? People need to be taller, but that is just too much work?

Where would Bosh, Wade and James be today? Not playing basketball. They'd be too short!

That's right... acting gigs. Whenever a casting call would go out for "egotistic little people" they would be the first three to respond.

One day, somewhere in the history of dating, there was a couple who felt bad that one of their single friends had nothing to do every Friday and Saturday night. They took pity on their friend and started inviting them to come along on dates. The 'Third Wheel' was born.

But... where would Chris Bosh be if that couple thought it was too much work to ask their single friend to tag along?

He'd still be stuck in Toronto where nobody cares. And people might still think he's a great basketball player. Whoops.

Before games, LeBron James likes to dip his hands into a bowl of chalk and then toss it into the air in a "look at me! look at me! seriously everyone look at me!" display because apparently he did not get enough attention as a child.

But getting all that chalk is hard work! Someone has to get it for him, crush it into a fine powder and then deliver it to him.

But what if, one day, James' chalk fetcher decided it was too much work to get the chalk? What if LeBron just had to toss whatever he wasn't using into the air?

Although picking up all those things is probably too much work. He'd probably just take a nap.

The Heat also wish the guy who created the NBA playoffs didn't want to work hard. They were hoping the title would be awarded to the team with the biggest collective ego and sense of self importance without having to play any games.

So keep spreading the message that hard work and dedication is overrated. Keep acting like you should just be handed everything without working for it. And maybe, just maybe if kids don't work real hard, someday they can win nothing together but act like they're already the best team ever just like you.

Bruins should've signed "entry level" players over Kevan Miller

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Bruins should've signed "entry level" players over Kevan Miller

Fred Toucher and Joe Haggerty disagree about the new deal the Boston Bruins gave Kevan Miller and got in a heated debate Wednesday morning on Toucher & Rich.

Haggerty says the Bruins would be better off with "players on entry level deals" over Miller for the money he'll received.

Miller signed a four-year deal worth $10 million on Monday.

As for Toucher? Watch the video above for his response. Then comment below with your thoughts on the deal.

Freeney, who expressed interest in joining Pats, taking physical for Bengals

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Freeney, who expressed interest in joining Pats, taking physical for Bengals

Dwight Freeney, who expressed a modicum of interest last week in joining the Patriots, is being checked out on Wednesday by the Cincinnati Bengals.

The 36-year-old pass rusher, who had an eight-sack season with the Cardinals last year, is in Cincy for a physical, according to ESPN’s Adam Schefter

The Patriots kicked the tires on Freeney back in 2013 before Freeney spent two seasons with the Chargers. He was with Arizona for just one season and has expressed that his first choice is to return to the Cardinals. 

Felger: Bottom's always up with Bruins

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Felger: Bottom's always up with Bruins

Peter Chiarelli may be long gone from Causeway Street, but his spirit lives on. 

If someone can explain to me the Bruins' fascination with bottom-of-the-roster veterans with average talent, then I'd love to hear it. I used to think it was the problem of Chiarelli, the B's former general manager. But now I have to wonder if it's just in the water down there. And current GM Don Sweeney is chugging it.

I have no other explanation for the team's decision to sign defenseman Kevan Miller to a four-year (four!) extension worth $10 million yesterday. Miller is a nice role piece. But how that translates to four guaranteed years when he will turn 29 early next season and the Bruins have massive holes throughout their roster is beyond me. 

What's more, the B's already have nearly the identical player in Adam McQuaid, who is roughly the same age, same size, same shot (right), same injury history (poor) and plays the same role (bottom pairing, right side). McQuaid is a little less skilled than Miller, so of course, using Bruins logic, he makes a little more ($2.75 million). But McQuaid also got four years when he re-signed prior to last season.

Certainly, contracts worth $2-3 million annually aren't going to ruin your cap in a vacuum. But start adding them up you see how the Bruins got into trouble in the first place. Combine McQuaid and Miller's hits and you have $5.25 million of valuable space chewed up against the cap. Basically, that's the price of a solid, top-4 defenseman, which the Bruins need ten times more than a depth piece.

Scary. The Bruins currently don't have a No. 1 or a No. 2 defensemen. (Sorry, Bruins writers, Zdeno Chara belongs on a second pairing right now.) Yet they have decided to lock themselves up with a pair of No. 6 guys who basically duplicate each other. Again, why do the B's continue to overpay the bottom of the depth chart when the top is so lousy?

It's one thing for Chiarelli to overcommit to the likes of Chris Kelly, Rich Peverley, Dan Paille, Greg Campbell, Dennis Seidenberg, etc. Those guys at least helped you win a Cup and get to another final. From an emotional standpoint, you can explain those mistakes. But Miller? He's been a part of one of the worst defense corps in the league the last few years. He's been on a team that has failed to make the playoffs two consecutive seasons. How do you fall in love with that guy?

Please don't tell me that Miller would have gotten that contract on the open market. I mean, it's true; he probably would have. But what does that matter? Does that mean it's a good deal? Just because Colorado was willing to pay Carl Soderberg just under $5 million a season, does that mean the B's should have paid the middling centerman that money last year? Of course not. Use your head. Just because someone else gets stupid doesn't mean you have to.

You shudder to think what's coming next. Loui Eriksson is still out there as a pending free agent. Ditto for Torey Krug. On a good team, the former is a third liner and the latter is another third-pairing guy. Neither have been good enough to lift the B's above the playoff line the last two years despite playing prominent roles. Both are about to get overpaid on the market . . . unless the B's step in first and insist on being the team that gets stupid and overcommits first.

Given what we've seen with Miller, how can anyone be confident that the B's will be smart enough to pass? My confidence level on this is somewhere around 0.0.

Which is exactly how much cap space the B's will have left with this approach.

Email Felger at mfelger@comcastsportsnet.com. Listen to Felger and Mazz weekdays, 2-6 p.m. on 98.5 FM. The simulcast runs daily on CSN.