Canada hates sharing, especially athletes

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Canada hates sharing, especially athletes

By Jon Fucile
WickedGoodSports.com

America's Hat. That Country to the North.

Canada is known by many names to us here in America. C-eh-N-eh-D-eh. Canada. For so long they've been a punch line in jokes.

What is big, boring and cold? Canada!

What do pee and Canadian beer have in common? The taste!"

They've put up with the abuse with a smile. We think. Not sure. They all look weird. Then America started messing with Canada's biggest import and now things are getting hairy.

Yes, a few American NHL teams recently traded for players from Canadian teams and all of a sudden there are "visa problems" preventing these players from escaping moving to America to be with their new teams and drive cars to work instead of a moose.

Hockey players have long been Canada's biggest commodity and are responsible for 98 of their total income. America is trying to get a piece of that hockey pie.

Chris Kelly (Boston from Ottawa) and Kris Versteeg (Toronto to Philadelphia) were recently traded and magically had visa issues which delayed them from joining their new teams in a timely manner.

Visa issues was just another phrase for riots.

Canada hasnt seen an uproar like this since they found out Alaska was actually part of America.

Kelly and Versteeg, desperate to get out of Canada before they died of boredom or moose meat parasites, tried all sorts of ways to get out of the country while the Canadian government made up all kinds of lame excuses to keep them in Canada.

They tried to have friends smuggle them out of the country in the trunk of a car, but they were busted by border patrol.

They tried riding a moose and jumping over the border..

..but they were stopped by an angry Canadian mob.

With their visa issues still not worked out, Kelly and Versteeg tried to dress as Mounties and told some Canadian officials they were going to invade America, but Canadian cesspool Pam Anderson intercepted them and infected them. Tough luck boys.

While recovering, the traded duo had an epiphany.. Canada.. doesnt have any weapons! They can just walk home if they wanted to and Canadians really cant do anything about it, especially if they fight anything like the Montreal Canadiens.

But hey, nice try Canada. Youre so adorable. Maybe youll get us next time. Maybe.

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Yabusele expects to be on Celtics summer league roster

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Yabusele expects to be on Celtics summer league roster

ROXBURY, Mass. – The Boston Celtics shocked many on draft night last week when they selected French forward Guerschon Yabusele with the 16th overall pick.

Well here’s another unexpected twist involving Yabusele: He said he plans to be on the Celtics’ summer league team which begins play next week in Salt Lake City.

“My agent is working in France to do something for me, to be able to play in summer league,” Yabusele said.

Like most NBA rookies, Yabusele is eager to get on the floor and get his first taste of NBA basketball this summer.

“That’s a dream come true,” Yabusele said. “When I was young thinking about the NBA all the time. I knew it would happen at some point.”

But the 20-year-old forward isn’t focused on testing the NBA waters and returning to overseas play soon.

“Not just stay three years or four, but stay all my life in the NBA,” he said.

Yabusele made the announcement following the Boston Celtics’ rookies (minus Ante Zizic) all participating in a basketball clinic at the Madison Park Community Center as the Boston Celtics celebrated their 50th Renovation project since 2008.

The news isn’t quite as optimistic for fellow international Celtic Ante Zizic who is not likely to have his contract situation overseas worked out in enough time to join Boston for summer league play in Salt Lake City and afterwards in Las Vegas.

Still, Yabusele getting a shot to play now is huge both for his own personal growth and that of the Celtics to get a better feel for how their first-round pick stacks up against fellow rookies and young teammates like Jordan Mickey.

This past season, Yabusele averaged 11.5 points and 6.8 rebounds in 28.7 minutes with Rouen Metropole Basket in the LNB Pro A league in France. He appeared in 34 games and grabbed 10 or more rebounds 11 times while tallying eight double-doubles.