Boston is the best... again


Boston is the best... again

By Justin Aucoin

You may not have known this but on Sunday Boston added yet another championship trophy to its award case. You may not have known this because 1) you lost power or 2) you dont follow professional lacrosse.

But on Sunday the Boston Cannons brought home its first Major League Lacrosse (MLL) title after an impressive 10-9 victory over the Hamilton Nationals.

We know the Steinfeld Cup wont be too lonely in its new home, though we are curious as to why its called a cup when its more like a spoon.

With the Bruins having brought home Lord Stanley we can only imagine the anti-Boston backlash will be stronger than ever. And since the Boston haters are always looking for new reasons to hate on this fine city, weve decided to help them out.

Here are other titles Boston have won over the past year.

Best at being worst dressed

Thats right. It takes a lot of effort and a huge population of hipsters to be named GQs best at not being able to dress well.
Boston is like America's Bad-Taste Storm Sewer: all the worst fashion ideas from across the country flow there, stagnate, and putrefy. To be fair, it's hard to be a fashion capital when half of your population is made up of undergraduate hoodie monsters, including those unfortunate coeds who don't realize that leggings-as-pants were supposed to be paired with tops large enough to conceal their cameltoes.

Damn straight. And thats just the Patriots.

We suck at dressing ourselves and dont you forget that America. If you have a problem with it, well, click on

Best at being meanies

A pair of University of Michigan psychologists named Boston the U.Ss meanest city. Boston residents instantly gave said psychologists atomic-wedgies and stuffed them in their lockers for being nerds.

Mayor Mumbles on the findings:

"I think look at here today, everybody's friendly here," said Mayor Tom Menino. "I go to all the events in the city of Boston. People say, Gee what a friendly city. Ask the cab drivers. They think we have a friendly city also. I don't know who did this poll. I never heard of it. It's one of those polls that some people I don't think there's any credibility in it at all."

First off, I dont think cabbies are a reputable bunch to call upon for character witnesses. Secondly, unless Menino met folks from the movie Pleasantville, no way in hell anyone in Boston said Gee, what a friendly city. Were pretty sure there were a few carefully placed f-bombs thrown in there. Thirdly, the folks who came up with this poll probably were Canadiens fans.

1 digital city in America

Little known title Boston took in last November were wire(less)ed up the wazoo. Said Mumbles:
I am proud of the way that we are using technology to make government more accessible to Bostons residents, businesses and visitors, said Mayor Menino. This recognition is an honor for the Department of Innovation and Technology and the entire City of Boston.
How did we become so technologically advanced? Its simple. We found the Borg.

We just hope this doesnt backfire.

Most innovative city in the world

Thats right. Boston is so awesome were even better than cities in other countries. Via
Inits latest index, Australian analyst firm2thinknowsays Beantown leads the world in relative performance in the global innovation economy. That means the citys actions to facilitate the growth of new industries are opening up a better economic opportunity for talent.

So next time someone complains about Boston being a bunch of educated, liberal northeast elitists be sure to tell them to 1) Suck it and 2) Yea, well, were helping the economy by creating new economic opportunity so, suck it.

Second most pot friendly city

OK, so we cant win them all.

But when your pro-weed group is led by a bunch of potheads, do you really expect to get the type of political pull it takes to win such a title?

Whats next?

So with all these titles Bostons bringing in we have just one thing to say:

Your move Boston Blazers.

Curran: Even Brady's absence won't be enough to halt Patriots

Curran: Even Brady's absence won't be enough to halt Patriots

Call this a companion piece to my guy Phil Perry’s well-written AFC Power Rankings. The Senator puts the Patriots at No. 1 -- even with the greatest quarterback of his (or any) generation cooling his heels in Brookline for September -- and you really can’t argue with that.

When the Patriots had their full complement of players in 2015, the gap between them and their weekly opponents was significant. They began the season with 10 straight wins. Of those, only one -- the 27-26 win at the Giants -- had a margin of victory smaller than seven points.

When the injury attrition came and the offense was reduced to a shell of itself, that’s when the losses came . . . and they still finished 12-4 (You still don’t get the Miami game? Honestly, neither do I.).

And even in the AFC Championship Game against Denver -- whose played defense at a disturbingly high level during that tight span near the end of the year and into the postseason, and undressed the Patriots offensive line -- New England still almost willed its way to SB50.

This year, the Patriots' projected Opening Day starters may be even better than they were in 2015 except for, ya know . . .

Martellus Bennett is in for Scott Chandler on offense. Defensively, Jabaal Sheard assumes the top-of-the-depth-chart role of Chandler Jones, Chris Long is now the third edge defender, Dominique Easley is out but his loss is mitigated by the addition of a run-stuffer in Terrance Knighton and the presumed maturation of Malcom Brown, Geneo Grissom and Trey Flowers. The jury’s going to be out on Shea McClellin for a while but he’s better than Dane Fletcher, who was ticketed for the linebacker corps in 2015. Tarell Brown won’t be starting at corner. Bradley Fletcher won’t be chasing butterflies. Logan Ryan’s got another year of experience and the Cyrus Jones addition is intriguing on defense and special teams.

I know those are merely projections and we have no real idea who will be there against the Cardinals (Julian Edelman being my No. 1 concern), but the point is, upgrades were made.

And who else in the AFC can say that they did enough to close the gap? Within the division, the Jets are jacking around with Ryan Fitzpatrick still. Ryan Clady and Matt Forte could be upgrades and the Jets (No. 7 on Phil’s list) still have an imposing front-four, but evidence is needed. The Dolphins (No. 14) lost Olivier Vernon and have a first-year, first-time head coach. The Bills (No. 11)? Rex is already on the griddle and pressure doesn’t become him. The Steelers are No. 2 and that makes sense with the always underappreciated Ben Roethlisberger there, but LeVeon Bell’s down four games, Martavis Bryant’s down for the season and the lack of composure I saw with both Pittsburgh and No. 3 Cincy in the playoffs last year doesn’t make me a buyer on their capabilities. God bless the Raiders (No. 4), but Jack Del Rio and Derek Carr have a lot to prove.

Meanwhile, the Ravens appear in decline and the Colts retained their dysfunctional front office-sideline duo of Ryan Grigson and Chuck Pagano. It will take a couple of bad Sundays for that to lapse back into bitterness.

So even with the head start Roger Goodell provided the rest of the league when he carried out the wishes of the Patriots rivals and chased Tom Brady down like a common criminal, it’s still not going to be enough.

I don’t think that even that will help the rest of the conference make up the stagger.

What New England’s done since 2001 is -- as a team -- Ruthian. Even the two years in that span in which the Patriots failed to make the playoffs, they finished tied for first in the AFC East in both seasons and were nosed out on tiebreakers. They’ve been to five straight conference championships. And the last time they didn’t get to the AFCCG, they were the No. 1 seed.

Ten AFCCG appearances, six Super Bowl appearances, four Super Bowl wins and still with a strength-of-roster/coaching advantage on the rest of the conference.

If not now, with Brady shut down for September, then when?

Wednesday's Red Sox-Tigers lineup: E-Rod aims to avoid sweep


Wednesday's Red Sox-Tigers lineup: E-Rod aims to avoid sweep

BOSTON -- The Red Sox send Eduardo Rodriguez to the mound as they attempt to salvage the final game of their homestand and avoid a sweep at the hands of the Tigers.

Today's lineups:

Ian Kinsler 2B
Jose Iglesias SS
Miguel Cabrera 1B
Victor Martinez DH
Nick Castellanos 3B
Justin Upton LF
Mike Aviles RF
James McCann C
Tyler Collins CF
Michael Fullmer P

Mookie Betts RF
Dustin Pedroia 2B
Xander Bogaerts SS
David Ortiz DH
Jackie Bradley Jr. CF
Aaron Hill 3B
Travis Shaw 1B
Sandy Leon C
Brock Holt LF
Eduardo Rodriguez P